Week 16

The start to this week has been horrible. I feel like my glass isn't just half empty, it's completely drained!

I've not felt this blue in a long time. I have no incentive to do anything, or go anywhere or see anybody, yet I feel lonely as hell. I don't want to be at work, I don't want to be at home, I don't want to be anywhere. What's happening? Let's hope it soon passes. By the end of this week I want my old self back please.

Wednesday

Very tearful today and having to get through work is proving difficult. This morning the car-park attendant raised his voice to me for parking in the wrong space. Under normal circumstances I'd have dealt with it, but I fell to pieces and burst into tears. Just want to go home and hide under the duvet.

The rest of my day wasn't much better either. Students raising their voices to me, shouting at me across the room and generally showing very poor behaviour. I ended up leaving the room and leaving them to it. Was I glad to get home today.

Thursday

Stefan and I had a really lovely day today. After yesterday I was feeling particularly vulnerable, so the two of stayed in our pyjama's for most of the day and played. It was lovely to just spend time with Stefan, and he was clearly enjoying himself too having lots of attention and stimulation from his Mummy. He even helped with the bits of housework I did. Emptying the washing machine and passing me the clothes, holding the vacuum cleaner handle with me and even putting toys back in the basket.

Had a much needed night out with the girls too. Cheered me up!

Friday

Up and out at the crack of dawn to take Stefan to his Grandma's as I was in work. Had a better day with some lovely students.

My mood has definitely lifted from Monday and I am feeling like my old self again. Pregnancy hormones can be very brutal at times, and always when you least expect it. I worry that the stress of me getting upset and worked up isn't doing me or the baby any good.

I've been feeling lots of butterfly kicks at odd times, so hopefully all is ok.